This I learned: Life renews itself—God is present in the storm.

            Many years ago, when I was in the midst of my clinical training, I learned a very valuable lesson. I learned that any given day can be filled with joy and sorrow, celebration and mourning, hope and despair. In fact, in a single day, you can experience all of these things.

            As part of my clinical training in the hospital, I had to complete a rotation in the emergency room and one in the intensive care unit. While I was in the midst of my emergency room rotation, a young woman was brought in who had been in an automobile accident on the Watterson Expressway. She was single and had been living in Louisville for about a year. She had sustained a significant head injury. The hospital staff managed to contact her parents who lived in Pennsylvania. By the next day, they had arrived in Louisville, and they were keeping a constant vigil in the intensive care waiting room.

            The daughter never recovered consciousness, and during the next several weeks as she lingered, she never responded to her parents. Yet, they remained by her side speaking softly to her words of encouragement and love. For the first two weeks, one of them remained at the hospital at all times.

            As the weeks passed, this family made their way through the valley of the shadow of death. They experienced all the thoughts and feelings associated with the grief process. There were days when they were filled with emotion with tears filling their eyes. Any inquiry at all about the condition of their daughter brought a flood of tears. There were days when they were very angry. They were angry with the doctors, angry with the hospital staff, angry with me, and angry with God. On those days, when you inquired about their daughter, you could expect some very rude and harsh treatment. Many days they were simply numb. There were no tears to be cried and no angry outbursts. They simply waited.

            As I was with this mother and father day after day, I learned a great deal about how you make it through a tragic situation. You cannot deny what has happened. You have to let the emotions come and go. There is a time for weeping and a time for anger. Even as your daughter lies precariously between life and death, you learn to celebrate with the families you have come to know in the intensive care waiting room who make it through the valley of the shadow of death into a new day of light. You also weep with those for whom death comes, knowing that soon it will be your day to weep.

            The architect who designed Baptist East Hospital in Louisville must have been inspired by the Spirit of God, for when he designed the hospital he put the nursery and the intensive care unit on the same floor. As this mom and dad lived day-by-day in the shadows of death, we initiated a daily ritual. Once a day at least, sometimes more, we would walk from the intensive care unit down to the nursery. There we would celebrate the birth of new life. We would share the joy of young families welcoming the birth of a child. There was something mysteriously comforting for them to realize that even as they prepared to lose their daughter—life was renewing itself. Staring through the nursery window, the wonderful mystery of life was impressed upon us. At the same time, as we stood by their daughter’s bed, we again were touched by the deep mystery of life even as we knew life was ebbing from her. Through this time I learned that there are times to smile and to laugh even when we most want to weep.

            I also learned that in the midst of crisis and tragedy it is often difficult to be aware of the presence of God in Christ Jesus accompanying us through the storm. As the dark clouds threaten and the storms rage, we feel terribly alone. It seems to us that God cannot hear our cries above the howling winds. We are afraid that we will drown in the sea of despair and no one cares.

            Because of what I learned, I am always drawn back to that time when the disciples of Jesus were alone on a storm-tossed sea. They were frightened and afraid. Though some of them had made their living on that sea, they believed they would perish in the storm. Yet, Jesus came walking toward them through the storm. At first they thought he was a ghost. Perhaps they thought their eyes were deceiving them. Only Peter cries out, “Lord, if it is you, call me to come to you.” Jesus invites him to come, and Peter crawls over the side. He is walking through the waves until fear again seizes him, and he begins to sink. As the waves wash over him, he calls to Jesus who lifts him up out of the angry sea. Yes, Jesus comes to us in the storms of life. He is never far way. He has promised never to abandon us or forsake us.

            As we live, we must embrace each day. We must be prepared to experience many feelings, emotions, and thoughts in a single day. We must not be afraid to laugh or cry. Above all, let’s not deny how we feel. Let’s not silence our expression of our feelings. God gave us our emotions to help us through these times. God makes himself present to us in prayer so we may express ourselves to him. Let us remember that God in Christ comes looking for us in times of crisis. May the Spirit give us eyes to see him.  jamie